Conversations.
Apparently my conversations with the opposite sex are not specific enough. That’s what my near and dear friends tell me. This is supposed to be because when I talk to a girl I never go through a list of specific questions.
I.e
1) What do you do
2) Where do you live
3) What are you studying
4) Which Uni are you at
5) Do you have a regular period
Ok, maybe not the last one but in my idea that last one would be a question to ask. If you want details that is and I don’t want details. I want CHARACTER!
This means
If a Girl said - I love this song
My typical follow up would never be I like it too, it would be, don’t you love the beat or the lyrics or the musician or something like that. Its all in the character. I need to know that a girl can keep me in a conversation and that she has a brain before I find out how many sisters they have or how they hate how their parents control their life. Ermm... That’s not what I want to know. I am a very good listener. I've been tagged by my friends as "Duk ganna rala". Basically I listen to their shit. So I listen but when I meet someone for the first time and they explode on me about how their mother is so freaking out on them and how its such a pain that her parents don’t understand it I just don’t know how to react to that. I freak out, I don’t know if I should empathize, sympathize or just freaking CRY saying "not another one".
So after my date I meet Friend "A" who asks me
A - So Where does she stay?
Me - I don’t know, but I know she's leaving the country, just here on holiday
A - Where's she going?
Me - Australia
A - Where in Australia
Me - I don’t know, I didn't ask.
A - Why not?
Me - I forgot, it didn't seem important
A - What's she studying? Did you ask which Uni?
Me - Accounting, no didn't ask about the Uni.. what does it matter.. who cares where she studies??
A - Whats wrong with you what did you talk about?
Me - How she might not fit into local working environment when she returns due to the fact that she started working there and the whole change of culture might not be something easy to deal with and how she likes to get into social work and the whole socail shift Sri Lanka is going through.
ok, that to me is the defining answer.. not which Uni or what you study or where you live. What's on a persons mind, a personality a Character flaw that’s what I am interested in.. makes me sound like a freaking psychology student but.. that’s what gets me interested in talking to the person again.. isn't it? Because the details will follow, typically most people are not like me and they like to talk about what they like and don’t and how much they hate what they don’t like.
You can know me for five years and realise i've not volunteered my favourite song or colour. I have trust issues.. I know, i know.. you need to give to get but i have issues with trust.
A - Who cares about that (to the above answer), what's she like?
Me - sigh....... I cant explain, you talk specifics, I talk characteristics that’s just how it will stay.
Confrontation
Ok, friend number two tells me I don’t confront my issues.. My issues with my relationships. The ones I should push forward and the ones I should end!
I don’t confront because I'm too aggressive I'll end up making someone cry. So I just leave it.
Yet, he thinks I should be;
1) Aggressively Confrontational
2) Diplomatically Confrontational
3) Passive Aggressive Confrontational
but apparently I'm somewhere in the middle of Diplomatic and Passive without the confrontation and aggression. This is because I've decided I'm not interested in more drama. So I just leave matters as it is and run in the opposite direction. This however leaves a bit of a problem for me because I don’t tend to resolve my issues.
I am apparently supposed to walk upto someone and say, listen I have this issue with you, what say you?
two, I am supposed tell another person you fucked me over you sonnofabitch.. I don’t like you.
I know that all that would just lead to more drama.. and drama I don’t need.. I don’t want.. besides I'm good at walking away from things.. no one needs to know why i'm doing so, less painful don’t you think?
Alright these have been the general happenings since my birthday.. i must say, its not been quiet. I've found companionship in a couple of new friends who mix well with Soda and Tonic and a Pack never fails to keep you warm on cold night.
I've lost at least 50 % of my due sleep in the last 3 weeks, so I am tired and I need sleep, NO this not because sleep is bliss as an idiot I know keeps telling me.. its because I don’t want to fall down dead outta exhaustion.
The End.
